


not enough feeling to care

by whenfireanddarknesscollide



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, M/M, Not A Fix-It, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-04
Updated: 2017-10-04
Packaged: 2019-01-08 23:09:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 889
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12263976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whenfireanddarknesscollide/pseuds/whenfireanddarknesscollide
Summary: Their disastrous Civil War draws to a close, and so will the final chapter of their lives.





	not enough feeling to care

Tony tears his gaze away from the screen and lunges for Bucky. Steve’s hand across the center of his chestplate stops him. “Tony!”

Tony turns away from Bucky and looks up at Steve. His eyes are so filled with anguish, the emotion so tangible that Steve has to steel himself in order not to flinch back from the raw  _ hurt _ . But knowing that he was the one who caused that, that horrified  _ brokenness, _ nearly shatters Steve, shatters his will and his heart.

“Did you know?” His voice is so wrecked, filled with a desperate fury.

“I didn’t know it was him.” Steve pleads with him, silently begs Tony to understand him, to stop this.

“Don’t bullshit me Rogers, did you know?” Staring at the broken man in front of him, beaten and injured, Steve swallows hard. He remembers Tony, from before, so vividly, because Tony was absolutely riveting. He was a fiery spark, so full of charisma and influence, so exquisitely handsome and intelligent. The billionaire genius playboy philanthropist had always captured Steve’s attention, no matter how much Steve tried to fight it. It was dangerous to fall in love with Tony Stark because he knew it would only end in heartbreak. But in the end, it was Steve that broke Tony, crafted and manipulated him into the empty shell of a man that stands before him now.

“Yes.” The word unwillingly finds its way out of Steve’s mouth, and he can see Tony’s face changing, turning ugly with horrified betrayal a split second before the cold faceplate slams down and he throws an uppercut, making contact under Steve’s jaw, and he is thrown back, unable to parry the suit’s lightning fast movements in time.

* * *

They fight, and Steve’s mind slowly goes blank, his movements nearly autonomous. He supposes it’s his brain’s way of distancing him from the pain, the hurt he has caused and is causing Tony.

The suited, masked figure in hot-rod red and gold seems so emotionless, mechanical, but Steve knows the depth and layers of Tony’s emotions, and can see it slip, just for a moment, when Steve yells, in between the desperate punches, “He’s my friend!”

“So was I.” Steve can hear the sharp bitterness in Tony’s voice, cutting through the filter of the faceplate, as he utters the three, little heartbreaking words.

‘Yes,’ Steve realizes, ‘Tony was my friend.’ Sometimes even maybe just a little more than simply a friend. But Tony never loved him, never loved him back. He only ever saw Steve as a friend, a  _ friend _ , something so incredibly precious, something that now they no longer even have the luxury of.

And now as Steve sits atop the cold armor, bringing his shield down again and again, he feels the regret return in a flood. Regret for ever loving Tony, regret for bringing them to this point, bitter regret for breaking Tony to this extent.

The next slam of his shield strikes the faceplate with a clang and the piece of metal skids off to the side, revealing Tony’s face. Tony’s deep cognac eyes, made nearly black in the darkness, are consumed by raw anger, betrayal, and bitterness, pupils blown wide in utter fear. His face is beaten bloody, the red dragging grotesque tracks across his once-beautiful features.

Steve flinches at the look in Tony’s eyes and brings his shield up over his head for the final blow. Tony’s hands fly up to block his face, armored gauntlets thrown up desperately in a futile attempt at defense. It isn’t until the shield lodges itself in the arc reactor, shatters the reinforced material, that the full gravity and implication of Tony’s actions strikes Steve, hard. Filled with horror and paralyzed with dread, Steve slides sideways off the hard metal of the armor, his shield left protruding from Tony’s chest.

Steve falls on his hands and knees. Tony truly thought Steve was going to kill him. Why else would he protect his face? Horrified by the mere idea and disgusted by his own instinctual actions, Steve can no longer fight back the way he had done all his life. Instead, he can only flee. 

He gets up and yanks the shield roughly out of Tony’s chest, shards of the broken reactor falling out with the movement. Pulling Bucky to his feet, Steve half-drags his limp body through the gaps in the stone, but when Tony’s voice, cracked and destroyed, croaks out from behind him, he cannot help the way his body locks up and freezes. 

“That shield doesn't belong to you. You don't deserve it! My father made that shield!”

Numbly, Steve drops the shield with a dull clang and leaves. 

* * *

IRON MAN, TONY STARK MISSING, headlines scream days after their fight in Siberia.

Steve sits in his comfortable seat overlooking the Wakandan rainforests, lush greenery gently framing the stone statue of the Panther. 

SUPERHERO CIVIL WAR, IRON MAN STILL MISSING

WHERE IS OUR IRON MAN?

BILLIONAIRE TONY STARK LOST IN AFTERMATH OF SUPERHERO CIVIL WAR

SUPERHERO CIVIL WAR TAKES ITS TOLL

After a week of headlines and worried reporters, Steve stops checking the news.

 

Steve does not know how much time has passed when King T’challa silently hands Steve a news tablet. The headline reads:

IRON MAN FOUND DEAD IN ABANDONED SIBERIAN BUNKER

Steve cannot bring up enough feeling to care. 


End file.
